A one-time sexual encounter seems daunting at best to the uninitiated, and at worst it can seem impossible. How do people do it without tripping over their words, or their underwear? Well, it basically goes like this; down a couple drinks, flirt with the hottie you’ve been eyeballing, down a couple more drinks, and let your inhibitions go out the window while you’re on your way back to their place. When you’re finished with your business, you go home. Operation: One Night Stand completed. Easy right? Easy as it may be, there are still some tips and rules to ensure your encounter goes as smoothly as possible.
A big thing people often fail to remember during the heat of their drunken escapade is the Golden Rule. And the Golden rule is: always use a condom! Always, always, always! Trust us; the blurry memories are the only part you want to keep forever. Be responsible by getting tested regularly for STI’s. It can be tough to remember to use a condom and even tougher to talk about safe sex and STI’s, but it is a conversation worth having. It might not apply to every encounter, but chatting about your sexual history, being upfront about STI’s and even getting tested together are all good ideas.
With the golden rule out of the way, here’s another important tip; if you are looking for more than sex, don’t participate in a one night stand. You will most likely feel used and rejected the next morning. People have one night stands because they don’t want a relationship but hey, we all still have needs, right? This spontaneous casual sex is meant for a single night. If you end up getting married to each other down the line, that’s awesome! But, never have sex with someone you just met and expect them to make you breakfast in the morning or even call you later. Expectations should be gone over prior to your sexy time.
When you throw alcohol and hormones into a shot glass filled with sexual tension you might be waking up next to someone (or something) that you never would have slept with while sober (Hello, Beer Goggles!) For that reason, it’s a good idea to take it easy on the drinks. Another reason to go easy on the juice is safety. We make bad decisions when we’re intoxicated. Always let someone know where you are going and have a friend who knows the details about the situation.
Another thing to remember when it comes to One Night Stands is being upfront and honest. If you’re uncomfortable or suddenly not feeling it, say so. If you want to try things a different way or you aren’t getting your itches scratched, tell them! No point in faking with someone you won’t see again. On that note, don’t get overly-complimentary or make false promises, it looks bad for both of you and can cause a lot of problems. Especially if you run into each other later, awkward much?
In short, there’s nothing wrong with one-night stands as long as it’s safe and consensual. Remember, even if there’s only a little alcohol involved, it can compromise what is consensual and what’s not, a la Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines. As long as you both (or all) are safe, physically and sexually, you’re in the clear! Everyone involved should be aware of everyone’s feelings so no one has any guilt or regret. Just think for yourself. In short: Forget social norms, be safe, be kind, and have some orgasms!